The memories came whizzing at me without restraint. Past episodes that hadn’t been brought to the forefront of my mind in months, possibly years, were suddenly vivid and fresh, as if they had happened yesterday. It’s not a matter of forgiveness; that’s been extended. It’s not a matter of lingering over hurts; the wounds are healed with only scars left behind.
But there are triggers.
And I couldn’t halt the memories that crashed into my present time without permission.
It still confuses me how one can believe her world is stable, built on truth, and that she lives in reality when, in fact, it’s all an illusion—whether created by herself or someone around her. And when the fallacy fades and reality is revealed, the firm ground she thought she was standing on disappears.
I saw myself back then. I envisioned the floor caving underneath of me and falling through the hole while all around me—that which I thought was concrete but in actuality feeble and weak—faded, slowly dissipating into thin air. And the drop was long and took a while. Yet in the end it was God who caught me and carried me until I could stand again—this time on a more solid foundation.
And I wondered what that drop would look like today if my world again turned out to be an illusion. This time I imagined a short drop, causing only a slight tremor, as I live closer to the solid foundation. The drop would be relatively quick and without much damage. I chuckled at the thought of coming to an abrupt stop as my knees bent to absorb the shock—like jumping out of a window a foot off the ground.
And I am thankful . . . oh so very thankful my Rock, my Foundation, my Lifeline is not that far away.
Has your world caved underneath you?
Are you far from your Foundation?